Wow! Thank you so much for the outpouring of support and encouragement that you have all provided. It is amazing to know that I will have the prayers and support of so many people out there that I don't even know in my quest to better my lifestyle. Your continued support and prayers will definitely be key because as the days and the hours wind down, I'm starting to panic a little. I never realized how much of a crutch this has been for me.
I had a long, stressful, brain-spraining day of school work today. A major assignment due, and a big test due today. Anytime the stress got to be too much, I would take a break and "escape reality" by smoking a cigarette. What am I going to do to "take a break" when I don't have that anymore? I can't leave the house and take a walk unless I plan to take all four girls with me. Usually all I need is five minutes and a walk around the block with all of them would literally take 45 minutes.
Two days at a ski getaway is easy enough to handle when I am with non-smokers and don't want to gross them out with the smell of cigarette smoke on my clothes. But what about when I am back home in my own environment and dealing with the triggers that cause me to want to smoke. What then?
What do I do first thing in the morning when I am gearing myself up for the day and the inevitable stress that getting all my kids ready for the day entails?
When the weather is nice, I enjoy doing my studies on the patio and having an occasional smoke while I read my books. Do I have to avoid my patio in an effort to not have the desire to smoke?
I know I can do it. All the comments from everyone who used to smoke tell me that I can. But it's hard to believe that I can actually get to the point Barb is at and honestly not crave that. A foreign concept to me.
I am committed to doing this for me and my kids. I just hope they forgive me for being crabby for awhile.
I'm going to get fat, though. I just know it. I think I have an oral fixation so if I don't smoke, I will eat. And I just bought a whole bunch of new clothes that fit my skinny frame! What a waste of money!
Maybe the money I save from smoking cigarettes can fund my new "post smokers" body, eh? ;-)
Thanks for your continued support. I think I am really going to need it!!!